This morning I was going to write about a regret I had the other night, when I was with a group of women and realized that in my insecurities, my not rising up and owning that I am His daughter, I missed out on what the Father had for me: to lead. A weight has been heavy on my heart, as I realized that I was passive; I did not feel like leading even though it became clear that that was what He was calling me to do.
Aren’t we so good at beating ourselves up, filling our mind and heart with “I should” and “I wish”?
Aren’t we also, often, so good at being passive when we don’t fully trust?
I want to move forward, learn from the mistake, and be present with Him today, though. I will be passive today, again, if I stay shrouded in guilt — regret — and not have arms wide open for the gift before me, Him with me, this moment.
I want to learn from the past but be present today. I will lead the next time He calls me to it. I see Him this moment, beckoning me in, cleansing me of regret and shame.
Father . . .
Little girl, stay. Your dancing heart is what I am after. Looking back offers wisdom, but only if it is turned over to Me. Otherwise, it damages this heart I have given you, whom I have made you to be. What is the purpose of regret? Be present with Me now. Seek My face now. There is always a new beginning. Learn from the past, but don’t stay there. I Am here.
I turn over . . .
I do ask you to not be passive, to not be timid, to not question My allegiance, My alignment with you. Do you ask Me to go where you go, daughter? Or, do you go where I go? It is so much better when I lead. I know the path. It is lighted and sure.
I confess, Father. . .
In a room full of women, of men, of hearts unknown, remember that you are known, and that I give you words. In territory unfamiliar, where the next step is uncertain, remember that I have been here before. You do not go into any place alone.
Fill me with Your peace.
These days shape you, with My handprint on your heart. I bring you peace and confidence in whom I have made you to be. When you look back at a gathering, a conversation, a moment when you didn’t lean on me, when you didn’t trust me, when you set out on your own, trust that I was still there, delighting in you, whom I have made you to be. You have what it takes, daughter.
Help me to believe this. Help me to trust.
Passivity leads to stagnation. Everything you do is an action, a choice to partner with Me or a choice to do things independently, on your own. What you call passivity is the act of not trusting Me, forgetting Me, not believing that I am good. I give you good things to do, to partake in! The joy of partnering with Me! I do not withhold joy from you. It is for you — all My gifts, all the fruits of My spirit. You are My delight and I long to be with you. I love to see you see Me. I will give you eyes to see.
I know You are good.
So this adventure today is one of being present to what I have for you. It is not a looking back. It is not an uncertainty about the future. It is trusting that I am good, that I am your God, your Father who has you, who holds you in His hand. So, daughter, dance, see the sparkle in the sunrise this morning, the laughter in the moments when you love with My full heart. Notice Me gazing at you, walking with you, holding your heart to remind you you are not alone.
You are never alone . Today I Am. Now I Am. This moment these words penetrate your heart, and the next moment when you turn, I turn, too. Trust me more, daughter. The kingdom of God awaits those who seek My face.